Her 'Do These Days

I tried a new hairdo on Anna the other day and I really like it, I think because having her hair back really shows off her little face. It's 8 cornrows from the bottom up to a puff. This versatility is why I'm learning to 'row! Just wish it didn't take me so long.





From a distance my cornrows now look almost respectable--to white people, anyway. (Ha!)

A Day's Work (Box Braids and Beads)

My day's work:

In action:


In superfast action!


She likes them very much. (Or maybe she just likes getting dizzy.)

Wordless Wednesday

P.S.: My mother made me those pants circa 1978. They are corduroy and yes, a little flared. And very, very groovy.

Ruh-Row

First, the good. I thought these triangle parts I did a while back turned out cute. Easy enough, too.




This first attempt at cornrows . . . not so much. Must be my extra thumbs.



I know practice makes perfect, though. I'll have to keep trying.

Anyone have links to a good cornrow tutorial with pictures and/or video? How did you learn? Teach me, O skilled ones.

Cheery Hair and the Secret Weapon of Sports Parenting

Early last week I did Anna's hair up in more box braids than usual with green and white star snaps for one of her favorite things: high school basketball game! (She just calls it ball but makes a dribbling motion--to distinguish it from touchdown signal ball, of course.) I thought it turned out really cute because it was so crazy fun. Stayed well for days, too, which is always nice!



In the previous post she was doing her cheerleading moves (not just being sassy). Her favorite is the "Irish Rumble." Hands on your hips now, everybody, and lean back and forth as you say:

Everybody do that Irish Rumble
Everybody do that Irish Rumble
Iriiiiiiiish! (roll hands above head)
Rumblllllllle! (bend over and roll hands down low)

Or as Anna says, Ah-ah ah-ah ah-ah-aahh. Ah-ah ah-ah ah-ah-aahh. Aaaaaaaaaah! Aaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Okay, I'll have to post video. Trust me, she's got it down well enough to make her whole section of the bleachers crack up laughing. She wants you to do it with her at random times, like anytime you put your hands on your hips or while you're changing a diaper. Whenever the school spirit moves.

At this game she was given actual cheerleader pom poms by a real live cheerleader to play with throughout the game. This was good because at the previous game, someone gave her one but then we had to give it back, and the meltdown was epic. And every time she saw one, she wanted it. Theirs are so sparkly! And may I just say? Best. Toy. Ever. for a basketball game. She was an angel because she takes her job of cheering very, very seriously, as you can see.


The funniest thing was that she was not just cheering along but copying virtually everything the cheerleaders did. You know how they stand when they're not cheering, facing the game with their hands and pom poms behind their backs? Anna stood like that almost anytime they did! A two year old standing quietly with her hands behind her back for long stretches of a public event? God bless the cheerleaders, every one!

X Marks the Part

Here are a couple hairstyles I've tried for Anna semi-recently.

First, just to change up the parts so she doesn't get perma-part, I tried an X marks the spot do:



Also, the cutest overalls ever.

A week or so ago I tried a veil style for the first time. For a first attempt I thought it looked decent and it stayed pretty well. It would be cute with colored rubber bands, I think, but mine were cheapies that kept breaking, so I used black and put the little clippies in.



I think I may need to try some new products because her hair and scalp seem a bit dry lately. I've been putting it off because I'll have to buy online. I also want to attempt some cornrows and twists. But my first attempts may not be blog-worthy--except to provide humor.

Our Hair Routine

After my recent hair post Porter asked for the rundown on the how and when of doing Anna's hair. So hair's my report on how we do things around hair. (With a strong punny accent. Sorry.)

I'm pretty much a once-a-week bath-giver. I could claim this is because I heard too much soap and water can dry out her skin and hair, but let's review my motto: above all, I'm lazy. And besides, the dog washes her on average twelve times a day.

I usually use Pantene for Women of Color conditioner. Occasionally I'll use a natural jojoba shampoo I got from Northern Essence (they also have great diaper rash cream safe for cloth diapers and an amazing orange cream lip butter) and/or an Herbal Essences conditioner for curly hair that some random lady in Target told me to get. I prefer the Pantene, though.

Here is her hair shortly after a bath. MUST. SQUEEZE. CURLS.


Here it is later the same day. As you can see, her afro is much bigger than her baby's.


I usually don't put in any leave-in conditioner because it seems like it would build up, although I have used natural oils. But would some product help keep her curls detangled and un-frizzed longer? I may try some Curly Qs hair milk as some of you recommended. But for now I usually let her go the day of her bath with her hair loose and by the time I comb it all out, it's tangled enough that we'd both prefer I not do that every day.

I usually do her hair in the morning when I'm doing a diaper change/getting her dressed. I have her sit on the changing pad facing away from me—it's on a semi-low chest thing so she's sitting around my waist level, looking out the window. I put about five thousand books and things up there for her to play with. They are never enough.

To wet her hair to comb through I have a spray bottle filled with water, light olive oil, a couple drops tea tree oil. I know the olive oil seems weird but it seems to work and be cheaper and less buildup than trying to wet all that hair with a product. It just sucks the moisture so I use a lot, so it seems like I'd go through a lot of detangler-type product—wouldn't I? What do you all use?

I have also used virgin unrefined coconut oil. It's nice because you can use it on hair, scalp, and skin and it's safe for cloth diapers. And it makes her smell like a macaroon.

Mmmmm . . . macaroons . . . What? Oh yes, hair.

Once I have her hair combed out with a wide-tooth comb I start parting with a finer comb and the rat-tail end of it. Be thankful this is not a video or you would fast-forward: I am slow. But getting better. It's actually easier with slightly longer hair. If necessary I'll use alligator clips to hold sections of hair until I get them in puffs/ponytails. I will sometimes spray a leave-in conditioner on the puffs and the part that's left free in back.

I know. I said I don't use a leave-in. Except when I do. I'm a rebel against my own cause.

By now she'll have launched all the books across the room, dropped the combs into the black hole behind the changing table, drooled all over the hair clips, and started shaking her head no no no no no no until she's dizzy—we're pretty much done. On the rare occasion she's up for a little more sitting, I may braid the puffs. Often I'll leave puffs for one day and the next day I just have to comb the back and redo the puffs, which makes it more likely she'll sit long enough for me to braid them.

This is the beauty of having her hair styled: it's much easier to spruce up quickly. Which helps me get out of the house with her in less than the 2.75 hours it seems to take these days. And I am fairly obsessive about her hair looking good in public—I don't want to be that mom with the unkempt child, especially an unkempt black child, and especially especially white mom with unkempt black child. We all have bad hair days, but I'm too aware of how much attention is paid to my child and how people might judge her if her hair looks out of control, unfortunately all the more so for a minority child.

Also, I have a raging ego that feels sad when I appear incompetent and happy when complimented. There, I said it. Now you confess something.

Please leave a comment with your hair product, styling, and maintenance tips! (Especially if you think I could clearly really, really use them . . .) As your reward for reading this ridiculously long post and its excruciating detail useful only for my husband's reference in case of my untimely death (I'll file it with the insurance policy, honey), here is a photo of Anna whining. Yes, Mom, she really does.

Nooooooo more hairdoing!

I Have Found the Perfect Hair Product

And it is this:

From the news report*:

NEW BRUNSWICK, NJ—After decades of coddling young children, Johnson & Johnson unveiled its new "Nothing But Tears" shampoo this week, an aggressive bath-time product the company says will help to prepare meek and fragile newborns for the real world.

A radical departure for the health goods manufacturer, the new shampoo features an all-alcohol-based formula, has never once been approved by leading dermatologists, and is as gentle on a baby's skin as "having to grow up and fend for your goddamn self."

*Okay, it's from the Onion. Which is fake news, for those of you who are satire uninitiated (and really, really gullible). Get thee over there and partake of the rest of the article and other Onion hilarity. Dang, I wish that was my job.

Hair's the Thing

At the adoptive families' gathering a dad watching Anna said to me, "Her hair's cute. Is it easy to do?"

"No!" I laughed. "Not for me!" Then I noted that it is getting easier for me, and the difficulty has everything to do with my general girly beauty incompetence and much less to do with her hair. Her hair's not bad—I'm bad at hair.

Anna just had soft baby hair when she came home, and then a lot of that fell out, then grew back in and gradually got thicker and curlier. It was amazing watching the straight baby hair start to curl up away from her head and then spiral. One of those changes you can kind of watch happen and yet it sneaks up on you until one day you look back at old photos and realize how much she's changed.

So she didn't have enough hair for me to start doing anything with (besides spray and comb) until spring, and then her parts took me for . . . ev . . . errrrr to make and still looked drunk and disorderly as often as not. But I tried to keep practicing so she'd get used to me doing her hair, even though I could still get away with leaving it loose.

By June I was getting better and tried dividing it into more sections (though it was still too short in back for this to stay—wow, she has a lot more hair now):


Then I was able to try making teeny tiny braids and finishing them with snaps:


I have to say that although I usually don't do beads, I love that if I want to, I can easily change the whole look of her hair with different styles and snaps and beads. I had fun with it on the 4th of July. Voila, fully accessorized patriotism!


(Okay, not fully accessorized: no flag pin.)

Anna definitely has hair that's the exact opposite of mine. I think it's pretty high on the scale of thick and curly. And it grows up/out. Don't get me wrong—I love her loose curls, especially right after a bath when they are incredible tight spirals (I will try to get a picture soon). But they don't stay defined well for too long, and now her hair is so long and thick that if I don't put at least some of it in puffs or braids, combing it out becomes difficult enough to well exceed a 19-month-old's attention span. And I need to save as much of that attention span as possible for getting the ponytails sectioned off before she starts, in an apparent attempt at humor, shaking her head no no no no no no no. You try doing that to your hairstylist sometime and see how well she does.

But my braiding is getting better and it's getting easier with a little more length to grab. My parts go a lot faster and are straighter. I can even get a couple days out of a style before redoing it, or just keep the parts and redo the puffs or braids.

So I'm partly just noting my progress and partly surveying for tips here: How are the rest of you who are new to handling this kind of hair doing? Those of you whose girls rock the cool headbands, what kind works best and how do you get your kid to leave it on (for the love of pete!)? Any product you'd recommend that might help me be able to leave Anna's free? Is Carol's Daughter all it's cracked up to be, for this kind of hair? What product? (And can you get Brad to come over and give me a demo?)

Friday Face

"Raaaar!"

Also, if your mom makes you some piggy tails that are kind of crookedey but still really cute, you should totally mash your green beans into them. She will really appreciate it.

This Little Piggy . . .

. . . is also cute in a headband!

A note from little Cindy Lou Who's mother: Please don't look too closely at this little piggy's parts. All this hair experimentation is still very much in beta testing around here.